It's called Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull. All historical, geographical, scientific, and logical inaccuracies aside, this movie teetered dangerously close to the boundaries between parody and shitty movie. Here's a hypothetical moment during the writing of this film:
Speilberg: Whoa, ok, so they're headed down these rapids towards a water fall. How are we gonna get 'em out?
Writer 1: Dunno, sir. Haven't got that far yet.
Spielberg: Fuck it. We'll just have them descend the falls and survive. I've got some special effects up my sleeve to make viewers forget just how implausible this is.
Writer 2: Well. That saves the trouble, doesn't it?
Spielberg: Yeah, it'll be so great that we may just do it three times!
Writer 1: You guys ready for lunch?
Spielberg: Don't say I never make your jobs easier.
Strangely, I think if I were high or drunk, I would enjoy this movie more upon a second viewing. Oh, and did I mention the Crystal Skull has something to do with aliens? I'll say no more. Just do what you want with that information.
Tuesday, May 27, 2008
I saw a stupid movie yesterday
Al Gore's protege?
Damn Canadians are ahead of us again. Apparently their schools are churning out wunderkids, like this high school junior who cultivated a bacteria that can decompose a plastic bag in 3 months! To get a sense at how momentous this feat is, it normally takes thousands of years for your average deli bag to biodegrade. So, if you have a plastic bag problem in your home, buy some yeast next time you go to the store, ground up the bags, add the yeast with warm water, and call yourself a clever Canadian.
Whoa!
Sometimes I get the feeling that there has been very little human progress in my lifetime. It's a frustrating feeling. Then I see images like this. Above is a photograph taken by a satellite orbiting the planet Mars. What you are seeing is the Phoenix lander entering the atmosphere of the red planet supported by its parachute and tethers. This is something that humans created to make happen somewhere 280 million km away. We did this. Amazing!
